From pipe-dream to footprints

When I first began what I knew at the time would be my final attempt at getting alcohol out of my life, I happened to read an interview of John Mayer in a magazine in a waiting room. It was him and a fashion designer who had hooked up for some collaboration. It’s weird I was reading it as I wouldn’t have typically read something like that and though I love some of John’s jams, I’m no big Mayer follower. Anyhow, in this interview he mentioned when and why he quit drinking booze himself. He had woken up one morning after a particularly brutal night where he had embarrassed himself, again. He said he looked in the mirror and asked “Who do you want to be, John? Do you want to be 100% of the person you are capable of, in which case you need to quit drinking. Or do you want to be 60% of your potential but continue enjoying partying, which is a choice too?” He said once he framed it that way, the choice was really clear and obvious, easy.

It had been two years for him at the time of that interview. He spoke so lightly about it, as it he had been freed. That came across even in print. I don’t think I was even at two weeks at the time I read that interview. I was still in a jonesing stage, where alcohol was fully interwoven into my life in damn near every way. I can see that now so clearly and state that now so clearly only because I have the benefit of clarity. I’m out of the vortex. At the time, I’d fight with the Mrs about how I really didn’t have a problem at all. Lol Anyways, my point with the Mayer story was that I was struck at the scope of two years from where I stood. The way he spoke is where I wanted to be, but holy shit did it seem far away! Two years? I couldn’t even figure out how I was making it through a football season. I remember feeling a since of daunt, of the task almost seeming impossible. But John had done it, he was at two years. Why couldn’t I?

It oddly inspired me and I never got it out of my head. I’m not sure what became of John’s journey with alcohol. I hope he’s now into year 7. I’ll be toasting coffee to year 4 next month. :-)